So close yet so far away

 

Desire

 

Desire can be a dangerous thing. At the same time as its synonyms are beautiful words like; Love, Lust, Attraction and Infatuation, things like Need, Yearning and Craving are also a part of it and do not have the same nice feeling to them, at all. 

Love is supposed to lift you up and make you feel great about yourself and everything around you. But when it comes to either unanswered love or that in fact the object for your feelings doesn’t even know the way you are feeling, love (desire) can and will eventually start to consume you.

It keeps you up at night, it steals away your apatite and it makes your heart go wild. It occupies your mind night and day and it never leaves you alone, not even for a minute. It builds up a play in your head about different scenarios that could be or should be or maybe never will be

And why is it so? Why does it have to be that way? Why is it so hard to put yourself out there and give it a go… To take a risk, to open up your heart and tell it like it is.

My answer is; the fear of rejection. The fear of opening up your vulnerable heart and the fear of getting hurt. But also, I think, something we all are afraid of, the fear of making a fool of yourself.

In most cases, maybe you are not living too close to the one you desire. But what if you are? What if your paths cross on regular basis? Are you still willing to take the risk? What do you do? Should you leave it like it is and go on with your daily routine pretending like nothing’s wrong? Or should you do the opposite? Man up and talk to the person and tell them how you feel. The worst answer you might get, is a that the feeling isn’t mutual.

I guess life is all about taking risks, big or small. But the road that leads up to the courage to take the step or the leap, can be long and painful. It can be filled with doubt about yourself and the outcome of what ever you might be wanting to attain. Living in fear is no way of living, refusing oneself from trying only adds to the agony. It gives room for negative meanings to a beautiful thing as Love can be.

Imagine if the outcome was positive instead. What if the feeling was mutual? What if the person has been feeling the same all the time… Wouldn’t you like to find out?

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